Berlin (ist ja gut, ne?)

One of the things about my recent visit to the German capitol that became emphatically apparent to me, were the differences between east and west. You see, on the east side a gang named the Bloods rules the streets. They crank schlager and sling bratwurst, while repeatedly chanting ‘westseite!!’. All the way on the other half of town thrive the Crips whose attire is colored blue rather than red. The scene lives mostly on street level, probably because the real estate is mainly grey concrete even if there are colorfully painted cardboard cutout facades slapped onto it.
Throughout the city there is an iron curtain draped along the streets that can easily cost you an hour of sunlight a day if you are near enough. I would highly recommend the semi-opaque foil that grants people privacy in their own home over curtains.
Shopping in Berlin is not that great, walking in a straight line I gradually transitioned from things I did not want to things I could not afford. In any case, it is dangerous to get gang branded without your own knowledge. You might be at peril getting involved in color wars. You do not want to be advertising inadvertently or be subliminally messaged yourself into drinking more ‘weißbier’ than you can handle.
I recommend the zoo. It is an excellent place to observe the exact same animals found in many other zoos around the world. Observing other tourists back to back is obligatory though since it completes the framework of an animal seen in an alien habitat. I was fond of the hogs that competed for territory and the holes they dug while struggling. This is typically German, or so I am told.
Travelling the subways is a pleasure indeed. What better way is there to simulate a bratwurst traversing your intestinal tract? It may smell a little quirky, sometimes sounds of indetermi-nable origin are heard, people excuse themselves and everyone looks the other way. And finally you are grateful when you turn out to exit the right place.


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